I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
