If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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