Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
