It's Friday. Sex?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
