Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
