Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
