lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
