im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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