Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
