i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
