If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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