you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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