Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
