my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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