The maid of honor just puked.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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