Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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