Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize