Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
