I think I died a long time ago.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize