I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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