sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
The Olympian is in my bed
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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