they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize