awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
