what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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