I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
