Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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