That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
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