honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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