no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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