So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
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