Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize