My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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