blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize