Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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