she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
