I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
