i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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