it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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