I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
