really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize