I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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