OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I am spending my child support on dildos
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
