shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
