i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
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