I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
