So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Randomize
