I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Randomize
