I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Randomize
