How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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