But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
