these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
